In-Touch

Articles and topical items - keeping you up-to-date!

Executive Coaching: “You cannot underestimate the value of having a regular time to reflect on the roles and responsibilities you must manage in yourself and others. 

"Executive coaching is principally concerned with reflecting on yourself in your role within the organisation, with a third party outside your business and personal circle.  It never ceases to surprise me how many directors are aware of areas they wish to work on but can only take their learning so far on their own”   John Weston, Director of  Director Development-  IoD News March 2001

Corporate Governance - The IoD is participating in an RSA project on governance in the NHS and charities, joining those from the insurance and pensions world to promote discussion in this important area of organisation life.

The article below on feedback was first published in the ANLP journal Rapport - Issue 44 - Summer 1999.  It will be presented here in three parts over the next three months.

FEEDBACK IS SELF-DISCLOSUIRE 2!

Part One

The purpose of this article is to raise awareness to your experience of feedback in the context of the workplace. I hope that our journey into your experience of feedback may reveal ideas and ways that will enhance feedback for you and others. Whether you work: 

	With others and need to give appraisals on people's performance or on project management
	In human resources within an organisation that gives your function direct (lucky you!) responsibility to drive the development of the executive team
	At board level with a responsibility to lead the whole strategic process and to unite the whole company, in collaboration with your fellow executives
	To establish and develop the consultant-client relationship
	To achieve results through indirect influence with customers, colleagues and suppliers in a department or on project management your ability to succeed and be happy at work is proportional to your ability to give and receive effective feedback.

 In this article I share my experience of working with people to improve performance - their own and others. It is proposed that the perception that "feedback is solely about the subject or subjects of the feedback" is misguided. With this perception, when (negative) feedback is poorly delivered the emotional reaction is likely to be an unpleasant experience for the 'receiver/s'. This may inevitably damage relationships. It does not need to be this way. If we adopt a different view to "feedback is solely about the receiver" and learn to manage our own effective state for receiving 'bad' feedback, the unpleasant reactions need not follow. By adopting certain NLP presuppositions and tools, paradigms and models drawn from elsewhere, we enable ourselves to experience effective feedback. Selfsense^TM offers an approach to state management that is helpful in depersonalising feedback that might otherwise be considered offending. Mastering our self-awareness, an integral part of our communication process with ourselves and others, enables positive experiences of feedback, as 'giver' and 'receiver'. Let's explore. 

What exactly is feedback? 

True to NLP style - "let's start at the very beginning, 'cos that's a very good place to start. When you start with ....." FEEDBACK. 

The word alone often triggers emotional reactions. When the emotional reaction hinders human interaction rather than promotes it, it is costly to relationships. In the workplace poor relationships means restrained personal and organisational performance. 

What is feedback? A dictionary definition is not what is sought. You know, as a veteran or aspiring NLPer, that this question draws out your own meaning of feedback. To put it in context: How do you experience feedback in the workplace? 

Giving feedback 

To facilitate your exploration just imagine the following scenario: some time in the future you and I meet, we engage in conversation and you find that you are making comments about having read this article. You give me feedback on it. 

Pause to ponder on the interaction as it ensues. 

What happens during our meeting? 

	What does your feedback cover - what are the key topic areas e.g. the article, me (as its author) and you (as the reader)?
	Where does the balance of the feedback lie - on my performance, the impact of the article, the style or process adopted and/or how it is a reflection on me as a person ? Does it cover all these areas?
	Is the feedback a reality check or an imposition? And whose reality is it anyway?
	Does the feedback include self-disclosure?
	To what degree are feelings part of the feedback? What influence do they have in our interaction and why?
	What evidence do you have that let's you know the feedback on the article was successful?

Before reading on, consider this question: What was your over-riding physical presence i.e. your state? Label the feelings you had about giving this feedback? On a scale of 1 to 10 where [1] represents 'easy and pleasant' and [10] represents 'difficult and unpleasant', rate your experience. Now, how did you manage your state to give me feedback? What did you presuppose feedback to be? 

What has this scenario to do with feedback in the work context? Everything. How often do you find you are asked for, or you offer, comment in an informal work setting? 

Receiving feedback 

The next part of your exploration is to do with you receiving feedback in a work situation of your choice. I suggest you pick a situation that will gain you the most valuable learning about how you are when receiving feedback at work. As before the purpose is to enable you to evaluate your feelings at the time and to be aware of how you managed your state. 

If you are comfortable with using Robert Dilts' logical levels, use it to access the information you want. I find it an excellently simple tool for information-gathering. Alternatively, you may choose to follow this process. Pick your situation. Pause. Imagine yourself in the situation and notice what you see, hear and feel. Check around and within you. 

What do you see and what do you notice about yourself? 

What do you hear - words, dialogue, pay attention to voice quality, volume, pace, rhythm, especially your own? 

Are you aware of any sensations about your body, how is it related to this situation? 

Perhaps you were aware of all these things simultaneously! 

Take note before your read on. 

Use these questions to draw together the information from this scenario: 

	What does the feedback cover - what are the key topic areas?
	Where does the balance of the feedback lie - on your performance, the impact of your performance, your method or process and/or you as a person? Does it cover all these areas?
	Is the feedback a reality check or an imposition? And whose reality is it anyway?
	Does the feedback include self-disclosure?
	To what degree are feelings part of the feedback? What influence do they have in your interaction and why?
	What evidence do you have that let's you know the feedback in this context was successful or otherwise?

Sum up the emotion/s and the state you triggered - overall was it pleasant or otherwise? If otherwise what is that? Now rate it using the scale given above. 

What do you notice about your rating and state management for giving and receiving feedback? Have you a preference for one? How do you want to change your experience? 

I trust the time given for you to connect physically, emotionally and mentally to your own experience is of value. You may now find the quality of understanding you will glean from the rest of this article will further enrich your experience.

©  1999  Joyce Chandler

The Part Two of this article will appear in May's issue of In Touch.  Alternatively contact us and we will send you the full version on request.

Joyce delivers a range of workshops based on NLP and Mastering Selfsense^TM.  Each is designed to develop advanced feedback skills for those working in the corporate environment.

To discover more about this and our other services, email or call us on (0)20 8891 5503

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